not a good mix
by ShadowDown
Summary: two wearwolves and a vapire are stuck in a house for a week! dear god! we're all gonna die!
1. hmm?

_Vampire?_ Sirius sniffed the air, confirming his suspicions about the smell. _Why dose James have a vampire in his house?_

A dark shape scuttled along the wall above the door to the living room. _Lycan? _She thought. _Why is there a lycan in the house?_

Sirius smelled her getting closer and knew she smelled him to, because of the change in her blood.

_He knows im here._

Sirius growled softly, hearing her hiss. _One, two…_ He thought. _Three!_ At the same time, Sirius jumped up, growling as the vampire jumped down and hissed fiercely, back arched. They snarled and hissed back and forth, neither one backing down.

"Hey siri-" James broke off as he walked back into the room, staring wide eyed at the scene in front of him.

The vampire hissed fiercely, moving to protect her brother. "Whoa! Fang! Calm down! This is padfoot! The friend I told you about." The girl known as 'fang' stopped hissing, but didn't let her guard down.

"Why the hell did you let a _lycan_ in the house?"

"James, tell me. Why in the hell is there a _vampire_ in your house?!?!"

"Hey! Calm down guys! Fang, this is pad foot. Pad foot, fang. My sister."

Fang stared defiantly at Sirius, never blinking. James scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "Well! How about dinner?" he said cheerily. Fang got up and walked out of the room, hair swirling behind her. She hissed quietly at Sirius as she passed him.

"James, why didn't you tell me your sister was a vampire?"

"Uh, hehe?" James smiled uncomfortably.

As fang slammed the door to her room, she hissed loudly, teeth barred in frustration. She pulled of her mesh shirt and black tank-top. Then she pulled off her heavy combat boots and black pants, until she was standing in her room in nothing but her under clothes. She opened her closet and pulled out an outfit, ankle boots with cargo pants and a sleeveless turtle neck with, 'fuck off, jack ass' written in large white print on the front. (Everything was black, of course.) Tying her long black and white streaked hair into a pony tail, pulling on black velvet lined cloak as she did so. She picked up her intricately caved bow and quiver, filled with black tipped arrows and jumped out the window.

"So what did you dot his summer?" James leaned back in his chair, grinning at Sirius. Siri shrugged. "Not much. You?"

"Oh yes. _Lots_." He said dryly. Sirius cocked his head, looking questioningly at James.

"Sisters"

"Ah. Well, I hate to say this, but I get the feeling that your sister is a dark and mysterious bitch who is exceptionally rude and seems to hate me."

"She has that affect on most people." James agreed. "Dark and mysterious, your right. Bitchy? Sometimes. She's oddly protective though"

Sirius nodded. "I've heard that vampires are oddly obsessive and protective of there clan."

"Well that's not very nice." A curtain of black hair dropped in front of Sirius's face before the girls face followed. "im only half vampire." she grinned evily.

"I don't believe we've formally met. The names Eliza. But if you call me that, ill run a fork through your head." She grinned innocently and held out her hand. Nervously, he shook it. She grinned wolfishly, pulling herself back to the ceiling and crawling out of the room.

"Your sister is a freak."

An evil laugh drifted down to them. "I heard that" she said in her sickly sweet voice. They looked all around but oddly didn't find her.

"Evil woman"

She cackled again.

_Oh man. This is gonna be a long week._ Thought James. And, oh shit. Remus was coming the next day!


	2. remus arives!

Hello! Im finally continuing this. I know it's very stereo-typical of vampires, but what can I say? This is like an hp/underworld cross over, (with out the characters from underworld) and under world is sooooooooooo stereo-typical of vampires.

Whoever reviewed me (forgot your name when I took it down for the first time) – I claim _full_ artistic license for this fic! And have you ever written one? Do you know how evil it is to proof read? Im sorry. I don't have an editor like _some people_. And do you know how many people are worse than me at proofreading? Sometimes they don't even finish sentences!

The moral of this rant: you flame me, I drop an atomic bomb on your ugly face.

---------------------------------------------

Buri: there are 45 dashes up there!!

d.w.a.s : you counted them? Sweat drop --;

Buri: grin!

Bob: you freaks are sad. Shadow just wants to say:

Floodle: shake spear once said, "Be of love a little more careful than of anything"

Urkle: hi

Bob: sweat drop idiots. --; that was ee Cummings, genius.

Floodle: he also said, "It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are."

Bob: not having to many trouble there, are we?

Urkle: hi

Buri: idiots --; that was, again, ee Cummings!!

Bob: SHUT UP! Shadow just wants to say:

Buri: that all Harry potter characters are not hers, and that if you flame her, she'll throw an atomic bomb at your face!! giggle

Bob: CAN I SAY IT?!?!?!?!

Buri: uh, no?

Urkle: hi

Bob & Buri: WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP ALREADY?!?!?!

Floodle: President Washington once said, "**Reset All** will remove your customized shortcut key assignments and restores the original Microsoft Word shortcut key assignments in the template or document currently selected in the **Save changes in** box"

Bob & Buri: CAN YOU SHUT UP?!?!?!

Bob: THAT WASN'T PRESIDENT WASHINGTON!!

Buri: YA! IT WAS ME!!!

Shadow: --; idiot. It was the Microsoft word help program.

Buri: oh ya. He he '

Bob: idiot.

Shadow: ok. Again, all Harry potter characters are not mine. You flame me, I drop an atomic bomb on your ugly face. And I apologize to some other author (sorry. I couldn't find your penname) for stealing his/her idea. She/he also has characters talking. Ok. Moving on now.

(I finished a whole page with this pointless ranting. That's sad.)

DING-DONG!!!

"Oop. That's the door. Ill gets it." James levered himself out of his chair and went to answer the door.

"Moony!" James swung the door open to revile his friend. Remus sniffed the air.

"Vampire?"

"Hehe. Ya, that would be my sister."

"Evil woman" they turned to see Sirius. "By the way, how you been?" he smiled and Remus made a face. James laughed at the long-time buddies.

"Hmmm? _More_ lycans?" Fang poked her head down above the door frame, scaring the living daylights out of James, and cocked her head slightly at Remus.

"Holly- Fang! Don't do that to me!" James tried to calm his beating heart.

"Sorry James. God I have a wimpy brother."

James scowled as Fang dropped to the floor.

"Hello. Im Eliza. But you can call me Fang."

"Yes. Apparently, if you call her Eliza, she'll drive a fork through your face."

Remus shook her hand and raised an eyebrow.

"Ok Fang. We gotta make like your personality and split." James motioned to Remus and Sirius to follow him. They followed willingly and Fang looked quizzically after them. She shrugged.

"Time for lunch."

sorry. short chapter


	3. day two: continued and ended

UK All The Way: tank-oo!! (thank you) you are so nice to me. yes. i decided to have sirius be a lycan as well. go figure.

loser with a llama: lisa, you are officicaly an idiot. (not that you werent already, but anyways) those are the old dead dudes you hear so much about! you know, remus is harrys teacher. sirius is harrys godfather. james is harrys dad. peter is the dude who turns into a worm and kills them all.

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20 minutes later, the boys came back downstairs for lunch, loudly announcing their arrival. _Stupid boys_ thought Fang. The entered the kitchen to find Fang sitting at the table, eating macaroni and cheese and reading a comic book.

"Macaroni and cheese? What kind of vampire eats _macaroni and cheese_?" Sirius asked skeptically. Remus jabbed him in the side as Fang glared at him.

"Want me to eat you?" she growled.

"Point well taken." He sat down, followed by James and Remus.

"There's more in the pot if you want any."

"If we want any what?" (Sirius)

"Macaroni and cheese, Einstein!" Fang snapped sarcastically. James got up and got them all macaroni (shadow: do you know _how_ many times I have had to write that? It is getting really annoying) while Remus poured the milk.

"Want some?" he asked Fang.

"Hmm?" she looked up from her comic book.

"Milk?" he held up the carton and shook it.

"Oh. Sure." He shrugged and poured another glass. There was an odd silence when he hand James sat back down, the three boys glancing around the room while Fang read her comic book.

"What'cha reading?" James asked, hoping to make some conversation. Fang tipped up the book so he could read it and he sighed. That wasn't the kind of response he had hoped for.

"Well, now that we're all _thourly_ uncomfortable, what have you guys been doing all summer? Beside begin stupid boys of course."

"You know that you're a total wack job with freakish split personalities, don't you?" Sirius asked as James objected to the insult. Fang grinned evilly at him, before facing Remus.

"Why don't you start?" It wasn't a question. He shrugged.

"Not much."

"You want to be a _little_ more specific?"

"No."

"Fine. You Sirius?" he shrugged as well.

"Not much." She scowled.

"What's with the 1 to 2 word answers?"

"Well, what did _you_ do?" she shrugged and grinned.

"Not much."

"Argh!" Sirius threw up his hands and she laughed again.

"I love bugging you. Its so easy." Remus and James started to laugh, earning glares from Sirius. This just made Remus laughed harder.

"Oh shut up." Sirius smacked him.

"no." he smacked him back.

"Idiots." She hit both of them over the head with her comic book.

"Hey!" they shouted.

"What? You scared to hit a girl?"

"no." Sirius lunged at her, followed by Remus. James shrugged and entered the fray.

About 20 minutes later, the four of them exited the kitchen, laughing and nursing bruises. All of them, except Fang, of course, had gotten smacked by her comic book (it was hard backed) multiple times and had big black bruises to show for it.

"Curse you and that evil book. What was it again? King Sullivan the third?" Sirius squinted at the cover.

"Shaman king, idiot." She snapped, pulling the book behind her back.

"Who cares? Why dose it have to be hard backed?" whined James. Remus simply sat on the couch, grabbed it from her and began reading.

"Hey!" she attempted to keep it, but let him take it in the end and keep it. She plopped down next to him and began to read over his shoulder. Sirius and James sat on the other side of Remus and looked confusedly at the book.

"You're reading it backwards!" pointed out Sirius.

"That's because it's a Japanese comic book!" replied Remus.

"Oh. He he" Sirius blushed.

Fang shook her head. _Boys._

"I saw that." James warned.

"What?" she smiled what she hoped was her most innocent smile, revealing her pearly white teeth. The effect was ruined slightly by the Fangs. Sirius laughed.

"Well, its 9. Im gonna go to bed." Fang stood up, attempting to get her book away from Remus.

"Really? You go to bed at 9?" Sirius asked dubiously. James shook his head, but Fang spoke first.

"Nope. I _was_ gonna read _my book, _but it doesn't look like that will be happening anytime soon." She gave up on her comic book, throwing her hands up dramatically. "Well, night all." She tapped her knuckles against Remus's head as she left the room. When she was gone, the three boys began laughing.

"Why are we laughing?" James asked after a while.

"No idea." Responded Sirius, still laughing. The giggles soon died down and they all lay back on the couch peacefully.

"You know," commented Sirius after a while, "if peter ever met Fang, she would probably scare the shit out of him." Remus and James laughed and jabbed there elbows in Sirius's side, earning more laughs from the dark haired teen.


End file.
